Don't do it, it's not worth it.

It Sucks Getting Pinched By Life

Crying_alone_to_sad_songs_by_SnowWhiteLeighEven Snow White gets sad and depressed some days.

People close to me are really suffering right now.  This is a very tough thing for me to navigate.  I feel for them and I mean that.  I FEEL for them.  As a Snow White, the Rapunzels and Scarletts in my life come to me to vent.  I, manic to help those in need, have a hell of a time detaching from their pain and drama.

I am feeling out of sorts, sad, mad and helpless.  I can’t help them nor should I help them.  They are capable adults and they will figure it out.  But, when they tell me what is going on, it gets to me.  Then I turn and look at my own circumstances and fuck.

 Truth?  I am not in the most ideal situation at the moment.  I just went through a bad breakup, am recently divorced (yay) I am renting a small room in a small house and share bathroom privileges with two others.  I am under-employed (don’t you love that modern day version of underpaid) at a job I love, thank god I love what I do.

I owe my attorney thousands of dollars for her skills at getting me divorced relatively fairly.  It cost me dearly to be married to the wrong man.  Financially and emotionally tapped out.  Yes, I have a few of my own challenges.

It is amazing how contagious dejection and hopelessness are.  Holy shit.  Just because these two people, who I deeply care about, are feeling dejected and hopeless, why am I feeling that way too?

See, usually I am expert at keeping my eyes on the brightest spot in any situation.  It is my Snow White nature, I suppose, perpetually seeing the good in things.  Ironically, that very nature seems to annoy the shit out of above mentioned duo.  They so resist any feeble attempt at getting them to see the bright side!

Me?  My shit sucks as much as anyone’s and what is happening for me right now sucks.  But I won’t let it get to me, doggone it.  I am glad I am catching myself, though, up until now I let other people’s dejection and hopelessness stick to me like a burdock.  It hurts to have it in me and hurts to take it out.

I am able to choose how I want to be right now.  Choose to act as if.  Act as if what?

Act as if I didn’t even know them?  LOL, that doesn’t work.  I really do love Rapunzel and Scarlett….I just need to limit their venting (read complaining) when it gets overwhelming.  No, what if I acted as if all their problems were already solved?

Wouldn’t it be nice if their problems dissolved?  Snap out of it…they both would be complaining about something in the new situation in a New York minute.  Truth?  I get to choose how I want to FEEL and BE right now.

 I can distract myself, put my mind in a different place.  I get to choose what my mind thinks about.  What a concept.

 So what am I going to do with those burdocks?  I’m going to put on some gloves and pick them off myself.  I am going to steer clear of the path where they grow and walk it out knowing that life unfolds, things work out and no matter how sucky circumstances seem to get….the reality is things do get better.

 What do I do with my sadness for them and the anger I feel toward the dastardly dudes who are causing them so much pain?  Good question.  Writing this article is a great first step.  It really helped me figure out why I was feeling so off.

What if the perfect resolution for this already exists?  What if I can ask to be guided to it?  What if I remind myself of this every time I worry for them?  What if I could rely on my inner wisdom and that source within me to guide me?

It lifts my spirits just to write that.

Can you relate?  Thanks for hitting the share button!

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