Stuck in an on again off again relationship? One minute you are hopeful that it is going to work out after all and the next you are pissed at yourself for letting your partner back into your life.
When you still have sexual chemistry and tumble into bed for mad fun while arguing during the rest of your waking hours, that just complicates the issues. Sex with your honey may feel delicious but being treated disrespectfully later stings like crazy.
Here are seven signs that you really need to move on.
1. Your partner does not have a job or money and you are paying for everything. This seems obvious but if your guy has been promising you he will get a job when he gets his shit together and it is going on 2 years….WTF.
2. When you try to confront your partner with what is not working and you fight, call each other names and you always have to back down for the sake of peace in your house.
3. If your guy is hanging out with his friends more than he is hanging out with you and disappears for days at a time with no contact and then when he comes around he just wants sex. If you still care for him and the sex feels good, you give it up and then pay feeling like shit the next day.
4. You feel alone even when you guys are together.
5. You stay with him because you know when he __________(fill in the blank: grows up a little, finishes school, gets a job, stops drinking) he will be the perfect guy. Really?
6. You put his needs and his excuses ahead of yourself so much that you lose yourself and your own life and interests. The more you pour into his life, the more he neglects you and your needs.
7. Your friends have been bugging you for months to just let go and move on. You are annoyed but you know in your heart is true. You know you deserve better but he comes around sweet talking you and you fall into it all over again.
If you recognize yourself in any of these sad scenarios, your friends, family and I took a poll and we say….It is time to move on. I know it isn’t easy and that it is crazy to think that you can still care for someone who is so mean when the relationship is so clearly broken
You will miss your partner like crazy for awhile.
There is nothing you can do about that fact but accept it. It will take time, patience and the support of your friends to get over him, but you can do it. You deserve to be happy.
Don’t Give Him Another Chance
If you have taken him back before, it may be harder for you to say no and mean it. The best thing you can do is to detach from him and practice being alone. Don’t be afraid of being alone…there is nothing lonelier than being in a relationship where you are invisible to your partner.
There are three things you can do to help yourself break it off:
1. Remove your partner from your social media feeds. Stop stalking him online and reading his updates, seeing who he hangs with and what he is doing without you.
2. Have one of your friends be your Breakup Buddy. You need someone you can call when you are weak and want to be with your STBX (Soon To Be Ex) for any reason at all. Having a friend be your 911 when you are crazy enough to want him again is super helpful. A non judgmental and mature friend can bump you into reality.
3. The Rubber Band Torture: This is serious business and wishing that partner out of your life is just not good enough. Sometimes you have to bring out the big guns. Put a rubber band on your wrist and every time you think of your STBX, snap yourself. I am serious. The brain hates pain and will eventually lead your thoughts away from your ex so you can stop snapping that blasted rubber band.
Drastic? No.
You are so worth it. You deserve respect, kindness, compassion and true love. If you have been settling for less, it is time that you step up to the plate and take care of YOU.
Need an extra boost of confidence for your new life? Check out The Breakup Cleanse: 28 Day Detox to wash that partner out of your mind and body, read more here: Breakup Cleanse
